Never in a million years

So there’s this guy. Well kind of. He makes me smile and when I’m having a bad day it always seems like he knows and then BAM! there’s a text waiting for me and its from him.
This post isn’t about him. It’s about me and the girl I NEVER thought i’d become.
I never really needed anyone, I could figure out almost anything without asking for help and I could fix almost anything by just kind of looking at it. (Plus I went to school for landscaping and welding so that helped)
I wont tell you his name because well that would be kinda mean to him since we aren’t really anything to each other other than two people who casually talk to each other and flirt. A lot.

(I’m laughing really hard right now, give me a second to catch my breath.) 😀

Like I was saying there’s this guy. I met him back in 2016 after I downloaded an app, (yes it was a dating app, being a single mom is hard, don’t judge me) Turned out we had a lot in common and he wasn’t like very other guy on the app who only wanted pictures which I wasn’t into giving out, sorry but that’s just not an okay thing to ask someone you don’t know. He and I just talked.
He wanted to know about me and my life and it was a nice change from the “creepy” guys who had been sending me messages (I deleted the app a few days after installing because I was so creeped out)
Only thing after I deleted it I realized I didn’t know how to get a hold of that one guy who treated me differently.

After a while I forgot about him and tried to move on. (Just saying dating sucks and guys are stupid sometimes.) I went on a few dates with this one guy and then things went south fast and it was a vicious cycle that he and I needed to get out of so I broke it off.
I then decided that I was just not going to look for a guy, because well I have my son and he’s the only guy that I like being around. (Plus hes almost 2 and hes a handful and I just don’t know how i’d balance work and school and my son and then trying to date, even thinking about it gives me a headache.)

I went to the bar with my friend and co worker and we had a few drinks (more like 3 drinks and 2 shots, plus it was the forth of July so we did fireworks too, fun night.) And I posted a photo on my Instagram page which is connected to my twitter account. And an hour later I had a notification on my twitter page so I opened it up and it was that guy. Shocked I sent him a message and said hi.

Long story short we’ve been talking ever since then.
I remember telling you in the beginning that this post wasn’t about him and it’s really not even though that’s what it seems like.
I was NEVER one of those girls who was constantly checking her phone for something from that one guy that you like. And last night while I should have been doing school work and stuff, i found myself (between welds) checking my phone for something from him.

Okay now I bet you’re rolling you’re eyes at me at this point, but I really was NEVER one of those girls. I’d been through some really bad relationships, and even worse breakups that left me a mess (still kind of a mess). But I never though twice about ever hearing back from a guy. And suddenly I care. A lot. Which honestly freaks me out.

Just saying it’s a good thing he lives 4 hours away cause those baby blues make me wanna write poetry.
Haha I guess I kinda just did.


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