Connecting: Easy or not?

Do you ever feel like you can’t connect? So here I am sitting on my bed in my room waiting ion my Netflix to connect to the internet and it just keeps saying there is something wrong between something I don’t know anything about. I just know when it connects it works and when it doesn’t I’m sad.

I’ve felt like I couldn’t connect with people most of my life. Not that there is anything wrong with them or because I felt there was something wrong with me just because I didn’t really click with anyone.

I know at work I connect well with a few of the girls there, sometimes there are issues and we try to work them out other times there are issues and we all blow up on each other. This hasn’t happened in a while (thank god) but the last time it did I blew up on a girl for a ridiculous reason and made her feel small and at the same time it didn’t do anything for me but make me look like the bad guy.

At home I connect well with my grandparents but like all family they get on my nerves sometimes but then again, I need to remember that they are only wanting what is best for me.

I certainly connect with my son. He is almost 2 and every now and then he gets to be a really big butthead but then I remember all the things my mom has told me about me when I was little and about my brother (which I hope my son does not do some of the things he does because I might have a heart attack) and I feel a little bit better.

At school in the beginning I felt like I connected well with everyone but as I started my harder classes I came to the realization that not everyone connects well together. Now don’t get me wrong some of the guys who are in my classes are awesome and they treat me like one of the guys, other men in my classes are rude and short with me. But I just shrug my shoulders and move on it’s not like I’m there for their approval anyways.

As for everyone else I just feel off talking to certain people, and people make me uncomfortable and awkward. Not saying I’m not already awkward but sometimes it’s bad. Kind of like how the storm trooper on the force awakens starts to go good. It’s just awkward.

So, long story short don’t sit and wait for your Netflix to load because you might start thinking about how well you do (or don’t) connect with people.

-Jasmine

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